the past week or so, i have been feeling a bit discouraged. my energy level decreasing as the days pass. i have heard the patience in my voice hanging by a miniscule thread. i have not put forth the effort to love or listen or care about anyone.
i have been empty.
yesterday, i woke up at 6am and laid in bed dwelling on my lack of physical, emotional and spiritual strength until i realized...i need a rest. a good rest.
and so i took one--a day of rest. a day for me.
after calling my work to let them know i wouldn't be in, i immediately fell back into a dream-filled sleep until my growling stomach forced me out of bed around 10am. i sat in bed and ate cereal while i started reading breaking dawn for the second time {yes, i am a sucker for the twilight saga :)}. i painted my nails, watched a little roseanne, and took a disgustingly long, gloriously hot shower.
despite still feeling kind of under the weather, i knew i needed to get outside and soak up some of the vitamin D that was pouring down from heaven above. and i'm so glad i did. it was the a perfectly beautiful day--one of those "i'm so thankful to be alive" kind of days. i drove the 4 miles to the beach, parked my butt on my purple towel, dug my feet into the sand, and simply existed. that is, until all the perfect sun-kissed female bodies started showing up and i decided to get outta there before i dove into comparison-mode.
after walking back up the beach, i browsed some of the surf shops in downtown huntington and ended up with the cutest, most ridiculously huge pair of sunglasses for only $3 dollars! what what!
after going home to change out of my beach clothes, i ended the day by meeting my friend, nicolle, in newport beach for dinner and chais. :) we hadn't seen each other since before Christmas, so we spent a good couple of hours catching up, talking and laughing, sharing our spiritual highs and lows and encouraging each other.
and sitting out there on the patio, under the night sky with the newly-bloomed spring flowers winding up the trellis above me,
i knew
that God knew
that i needed every part of that day.
that i needed rest.
but it wasn't pure, it wasn't good rest,
until it was truly rest with Him.
and as i sat there in the company of my beautiful Christian friend,
it was rest in Him that i found.
rest that kept me in the right now.
exactly where i was supposed to be.
exactly where i needed to be.
and there is nothing in the world
more beautiful than that.
"Tomorrow was not our business; it was His.
letting it rest with Him was the discipline for the day
and it was enough."
{elisabeth elliot}
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